Absence of Presence

I still haven’t learned how to sleep on my entire bed. Sometimes I lie awake at night, put a pillow opposite of me and envision his presence lying next to me, sleeping.

I’m beginning to get used to his absence a little more as each night passes. Some parts of me wonder if he does the same – the conscious parts know him better than that.

The biggest pain isn’t his lack of presence. It’s that I loved him with all of my heart, and he loved me with some of his.