In medicine we learn about our body’s amazing immune system. Specifically, how it is broken down into the function of two primary elements: innate versus adaptive.
The innate system is one we’re genetically coded and born with. It generally never changes, never adapts and keeps fighting the good fight for what it knows. We know that is really starts with the basic anatomical barriers – our skin, mucosal/glandular tissue and a few chemical ones at that.
Our adaptive systems are the fun ones – it learns, adapts and changes over time. Interestingly it becomes more aggressive to threats that are already known to it, that it’s survived before.
Sound familiar? Basically – seems to me, like when our adaptive immune system has had its heart broken, it reacts far more vehemently in the future to impeding pathogens that attack it. A unique trait that seem to be mirrored by the cognitive side of the host.
As we age and gain a few more ex’s under our belts, we begin to drastically change to the way we date. Sometimes we become more cynical or jaded about love, and sometimes we aggressively go after any potential flaw we see.
What we fail to see, is how we often engage to mask and deceive others about the hurt that sometimes lurks beneath the surface; or the skeletons in the closet we prefer to keep there.
We create and personify an artifice to prevent the ones we want to love from finding out who we really are. But sometimes this deception goes on for so long, that we end up finding that in order to hide behind the artifice, we end up finding comfort from the actual sadness and hurt that led us to create it. When this happens, we then ionize the real layers and truths to repel them even further away from a point in which we can accept them.
It’s at this juncture, we realize we aren’t the only ones capable of doing this – and this leads to doubt. Doubt within ourselves, and doubt in the others we seek comfort from. This doubt then allows our lives to be defined by the roles we end up playing to keep certain individuals close, and to push others furthers away.
The problem is, some of us failed drama – and the masks don’t always fit.